Rant Thread

Family members who leave top off of toothpaste

MrMickS said:

Had another flash their lights at me, obviously complementing my fine overtaking manoeuvre. Then, when we got into the built up village they zoom up and sat on my boot until I turned off. Obviously they'd taught me a lesson.

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lol

People who leave a voicemail message, but don't actually say anything!!!!

Average Speed Camera's - They are everywhere now...M4 From the M25 into London and all the way to Hammersmith....arghhh

Virgin Media's overseas call centres. Whether India or US based I care not a jot. On balance the US is worse with their robotised manner "Hello, my name's Cindy, how's your day been?". If I want or need social care I'll phone the Samaritans. Then there's the constant running commentary on every aspect of how they plan to assist in everyway possible. Pleeeeeease .... I just need an answer ... pleeeeaaase. Queing for what seems like an eternity, listening to some God awful muzak, and if you think I believe the "we'll be with you just as soon as we can" bo**ox then forget it. The fu**ers have gone to lunch and they're laughing at me. I know they are, they know I know, and they don't care. Arrrrrgggghhhh - I'm losing the will to live. Maybe the Samaritans were the better choice after all.

Aer Lingus Aerclub, very polite but absolutely useless. In fact you only get to talk to Aer Lingus CS team ads the Aerclub team feel it below themselves to tlsk to members of the public.

Another marathon session planned for this afternoon

I don't do ranting, I just quietly take it in then plot my revenge! Bwahaha ^^

GeoffCapes said:

People who leave a voicemail message, but don't actually say anything!!!!

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People who phone three times in rapid succession even though you don't answer.
People who send a text to tell you they just called and left a voice message.
People.

F*cking birds constantly sh*tting on my cars. F*cking flying vermin are getting on my f*ckiing t!ts.
Every time I clean it off I come back a few hours later and there's new bird sh!t on the car.
I wouldn't mind if I parked under a tree, but there are no trees anywhere near my car! FFS!

Dark car, Mark. Birds love it.

GeoffCapes said:

F*cking birds constantly sh*tting on my cars. F*cking flying vermin are getting on my f*ckiing t!ts.
Every time I clean it off I come back a few hours later and there's new bird sh!t on the car.
I wouldn't mind if I parked under a tree, but there are no trees anywhere near my car! FFS!

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Its their reflection in the shine that does it, dark cars polished will come off worse.

allandwf said:

Its their reflection in the shine that does it, dark cars polished will come off worse.

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Southmead Hospital had a major problem with gulls dropping stones on the glass roof and cracking the expensive and difficult to get at panels. https://www.nbcenvironment.co.uk/casestudy/tackling-anti-social-gulls-bristol-southmead-hospital/ Beware, it is mating season and they may take a "shine" to your car. .

allandwf said:

Its their reflection in the shine that does it, dark cars polished will come off worse.

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I'll leave the Merc to get filthy until the mating season has finished. F*ckers!
Maser stays in the garage unless it's being used.

It's not the reflection that causes them to c r a p on the car. Some birds prefer to do it over water esp if they have young as it prevents other animals getting the scent.

Dark cars do also attract birts attacking their reflection esp during the mating season.

GeoffCapes said:

F*cking birds constantly sh*tting on my cars. F*cking flying vermin are getting on my f*ckiing t!ts.
Every time I clean it off I come back a few hours later and there's new bird sh!t on the car.
I wouldn't mind if I parked under a tree, but there are no trees anywhere near my car! FFS!

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Gulls - Mark - Gulls. They don't use trees and fish pooh really eats into the paint, not to mention they are generally large, eat more and therefore shite like an elephant.

Its fecking Starlings round here at the moment.

I have ranted all the way down the A19, A1, A12 and M11,
It seems there are no longer driving lanes and overtaking lanes!

This is about pointless government introduced toothless and pointless qualifications.
Today I had to sit my Managers and Proffesional Construction Industry Training Board (CITB) test, took 10 minutes - out of the 45 allowed, required a couple of hours revision on a downloaded app for £6 and a fee of £19. So after completing in English out of the 20 or so languages available I call up for my new card which allows me to manage a construction site, something I have been doing for several years (20!)

The very nice lady on the phone then points out that unread a proffesional qualification, like a degree or NVQ -"A fookin' NV fookin Q! They didn't exist when I was an apprentice! I have an HND though"

Great just send us the certificate

What from 1990?

Erm - yes

Well I have no idea where the certificate is?

Well you can't have a card then - your sacked!

So the job I have been doing for years - I can't do on Monday because the card I did have had run out, I can't find a certificate for an exam I took nearly 30 years ago.

Well sir this is the Construction Skills Certificate Scheme - you can't find a certificate - therefore no card!

W4ankers

That's shocking!

It is, truly shocking; a pongo with a qualification! Whatever next?!