Comments that made me laugh / roll my eyes / etc. (preferably contemporaneous and please include the source if possible)

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I'll kick off with a couple. One recent. One not so recent.

"I'm definitely not one for sucking my own $$$$." said by 2manycars on Pistonheads this morning. 2manycars

I had a music class teacher when I was in first or second year, aged 12 or 13. This was 1977 or 1978. Really nice guy, called Ivor Mairs. Very even tempered. One day he seemed a bit put out and said to the class. Something along the lines of "Watch out for Mr Drummond. He has more faces than an onion has skins." Drummond was a weasel who I think was Head of Music at the time.
I thought it was a brilliant put down and will never forget it. After he said it, he just resumed the class and nothing was ever said about it.